Dear SS,
I can certainly relate to the reality checks you are going through. My own drama has forced me to deal with reality, both my issues and the inability of my Ah to confront problems in his life. I am trying to deal with what I can (my issues) and let go of what I cannot control (his issues). It is hard. I go to counseling every day. My counselor just suggested jounraling and I think I will start today.
You are in my prayers.