I don't think I can answer that question Jen. I know he loved his wife in spite of everything and talked alot about their first date and all the good times. But I do think he cared about you alot and thought you were a beautiful girl - and after everything that has happened and the way you stuck by him, you became even more special I'm sure.
Go live your life Jen...and do it knowing that you made a very special difference in his life. You were a good friend.