Hi Lisa,
Glad to see you here. I was in your same position about 11 weeks ago. My thing was Crystal Meth, I was wanting to die when I got here, I also have ptsd, and I self harm.
All that stuff has and is constantly getting better. I will have 11 weeks free on Tuesday. It's just AMAZING how much better I feel.
The withdrawels are hard, they take some time, but you CAN get through them. I started a thread here one time when I found a bag, to me it was like Eve and her apple in some ways, I've kept that thread up and I went to that thing everytime I felt like I couldn't make it, or I was going to relapse, etc... It helped me get through all the withdrawels... as well as the people here. Just Do It, is what I told myself.
I'm hurting right now for meth, not physically but mentally, I really want some, but I just drag myself through it, and get out of the house. There is an amazing life to live. But with meth and stuff, it won't happen.
Keep posting please, and let us know how you are.
Hang Tough Sweet Thing.