Originally Posted by emmanuel2012
11 years i could be proud of, and none of my problems would be existing.
Could be that you expected more than freedom from active addiction? a magical cureall?
I've got close to 15 years and it's mothing to be proud of, or ashamed of either one. Now the day.. thats is something to be proud of.
if the accumulation of years had anything to do with the existence of my problems, then I would have been living on a deserted island in a dreamscape.
I've had financial windfalls, almost bankrupted, started new carreers, lost jobs, began and ended relationships, ( some pleasant, some not so), surgeries, accidents, broke down cars, new-er cars, motorcycles, and even been jailed in recovery. And I've walked in wet shoes withoiut a decent raincoat.
recovery isn't about the absence of problems
it's about staying clean so that I can accept my responsibility for my part in them and take some action in theor resolution.
once i start walking, i'm not going to turn back. As cold and wet as i become, i'm going to feel that much better.
time to surrender, again.
Go get your white chip, read your basic text. be grateful to live another day.
Don't waste your time looking around you for the miracle to happen. Look in your heart for the miracle we become.