Five
Today I am writing from a cafe in B'tol (UK), my birthplace "way back when". I live in Australia now and have for close to twelve years.
As the title of this thread suggests, today (Friday 20th January, 2023) I have five years sober. I am sat next to a very close friend the morning after the wake of another friend, Sophie. Sophie passed away due to merciless cancer. She was just 46 years old. I flew over to support the friend I am sat by - she has really struggled with Sophie's passing. They were living together before Sophie moved into a hospice.
With five years sobriety, I have the wherewithal to provide genuine comfort and support. Me... Giving support to another human and not related to addiction or alcohol... I know many people will understand the gravity, the astonishment of actually giving that support. It would, obviously, not be a reality without sobriety.
This site, the people on it, you, continue to play a huge role in my sobriety. We are all in this together. The opposite of alcoholism is connection. Or so I have often read. I found after a couple of years of sobriety, questioning that statement. I felt like something was wrong with me or my sobriety was flawed because I often found myself being frustrated with many people. I learnt that connection does not mean I have to connect with everyone! I learnt that I have the ability to choose who I connect with, who I spend time with. I learnt that I had done enough work to be able to trust myself and my judgement. A wonderful realisation.
Echoing sentiments that are written by many who reach milestones, it is so worth it.
My first five years sober was 2004-2009 and I went back out. It took me a little over eight years to get my sobriety back. It does not get better. We don't "mend" ourselves, or figure out the elusive answer to be able to moderate and drink like normal people. It would be wonderful to write that I am now close to 20 years, but that was not what my journey had in store for me.
Life is a beautiful thing.
Kx