Welcome! Glad you found us & wanted to talk about what happened.
I drank for decades. In the end, I was reckless & did out-of-character things. A few in particular horrify me when they pop into my head. I always tell myself that person was not the real me. I'm a quiet, reserved person - the exact opposite of the drunk me. I'm so glad she's gone & never coming back. The only way to keep these things from happening is to kick alcohol out of your life. One drink will almost always lead to disaster. We can't be social drinkers.
I hope you feel better & less anxious by being here. Believe me, we understand just how you feel. This never has to happen again, though. You can get free.