Oh, darlin, I'm so sorry. It's the alcohol, not
you. If I had the courage I could tell you a few similar tales about myself. Hurt people I really cared about. Got naked, Did really stupid, embarrassing things. I'm blushing at this very moment in recall.
This could be the very thing that needed to take place so as to convince you about alcohol, and people like us.
You sound like you have a very good boyfriend, and if you weren't a really lovely person when sober, he'd probably have been out the door long ago.
Use this to your advantage, and move ever forward in sobriety.
Friends forgive.
Happy Christmas sweetheart. ❤️