I have been off the grid. A fav auntie died Sunday...it was on the cards, she was hospitlaised recently for a bad fall and caught COVID. Whilst her death is sad and I grieve for her, my little voice of bad tidings kicked in. My aunties family, warts and all are rallying, which is great. On my day of being revived/placed in an induced cma, my family were nowhere to be seen. I felt such a feeling of sadness anf loss. A culmination of everything I have fought or worked through, memories,etc. This is not, I think self pity. It just is.