Originally Posted by
StarrySwirl 
I don't really feel afraid to bring it up but I don't know the best way to say it. Maybe I'm worrying too much about the exact wording. We often ask each other "How do you feel about ___" so maybe I should just go with that if I do.
Also is he finding comfort in me not "confronting" him about it? Or does he actually want to be able to talk about it with someone familiar who won't react negatively? I don't know.
Maybe comfort, maybe not - there is no way to tell until you ask him. We can sometimes assume that, of course, a burden shared is a burden halved - but he may not think that. He may not want to discuss it, whatever the reasons are.
For instance, if you were sitting across from him right now and he said, you know I'm an alcoholic, I think about quitting from time to time but I don't want to (or can't seem to), I just want to keep drinking. Where do you go from there?
The "excuses" are lies. He's lying to you, perhaps to himself as well. Maybe he doesn't consider himself an alcoholic, maybe he thinks he is just self medicating with alcohol because of his "troubles". Impossible to know.
The bottom line is, it doesn't really matter if he confesses all to you or not, it won't change anything.
You might find the articles on these pages helpful:
"First the addict lies to himself about his addiction, then he begins to lie to others. Lying, evasion, deception, manipulation, spinning and other techniques for avoiding or distorting the truth are necessary parts of the addictive process.
They precede the main body of the addiction like military sappers and shock troops, mapping and clearing the way for its advance and protecting it from hostile counterattacks".
Addiction, Lies and Relationships