Difficult Conversations
Hi all. It's been awhile. Nine months since I broke up with my ABF. He still lives with me. I told him he could stay for as long as he wanted because the housing market is so bad and he wants to buy a house. I think I have to tell him to move out though. I have constant anxiety. About the drinking and the day after hangover attitude. I've lived with it for so long that I didn't think about it most of the time. I recently made contact with an old high school friend and have started opening up about my feelings and my situation. Having to hold up a mirror, to answer questions honestly like "are you happy?", has forced me to confront how uncomfortable I actually am.
I also told my friend about my ABF slapping me one time. And that was embarrassing to say. And that I still think about it. The shame of getting back together with someone who did that to me is hard. Among other disrespectful things. I don't know what is worse, that shame or the fact that I'm living with this level of chaos still.
Thanks for listening. I think I have to have a difficult conversation .