Thanks Venus and leshar (edit) and Dee and Jo!
I am seeing my therapist again, weekly, and he's great. Recovering addict and really good. I feel myself moving forward but I'm not sure how much of the anxiety is 'just' giving up the booze, and how much situational.
My ex is seeing a new bloke and it's thrown up lots of emotions. In my head I am pleased for her and logically it helps me out...I'm happy with my partner, and my ex is less competitive about time with the kids now as she has her own life to lead. And I also know that our relationship was really damaging for me.
But it's thrown up lots of underlying insecurities from my (dysfunctional) upbringing. Without being too melodramatic it's hard to feel secure and confident when you're treated like **** growing up 🤷♂️. My ex 'abandoning' me terrifies my inner child despite the adult Be123 being quite pleased abkut it. And I think this is causing a fair bit of actual fear in me which I feel as anxiety