Originally Posted by
Goldee6 
For a while, I thought I could help him but I’m starting to understand that there’s nothing I can do. It’s so so so hard to accept that. It’s a truly awful feeling watching someone you love and your future sink into an abyss and not being able to stop it.
Yes, which is one of the main reasons why people stay. But he is:
- An Alcoholic
- Cocaine User
- Possibly suicidal
- Abusive
Say a friend of yours came to you and said - these are my Husband's issues, do you think I can help him? What would you say?
He said he was sick of all this, when he left and that he understood your Daughter couldn't be around it - where is that now? Is your Daughter no longer important? Does she just need to be collateral damage to his issues?
You see it makes no sense, he will say what he needs to say to try to get what HE needs. There is a world of help for him if he wanted it. He can walk in to an AA meeting any day of the week. If he has no money there are charitable groups that will help him. It's not help he wants, he wants someone to take care of him while he drinks.
It is very sad and I hope he finds help, but you are not it, his issues are much too much for non-professionals to handle.
Maybe hang on to the serenity prayer as well:
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change the courage to change the things I can
and the wisdom to know the difference.
If you aren't religious you can always change that to "higher power" or heck, even your own name.