Hi Kaya,
I’m sorry you are feeling ill and also vulnerable. I’ve been going through this constant flow, or circle, of being angry, sad, then really lonely. It sounds like you had the misfortune of landing on lonely at the end of the long day. I don’t have any answers, because I’m still trying to figure all if this out myself with my gigantic tangled up ball. Take solace in the fact some of it prob was caused by just flat being physically run down. The void emotionally though, I’m not sure where we get to kick that out out the door for good. I’m pulling for you!!! Get better soon!