Yes O a "nice" tired. Not chemically induced exhaustion
Plus, I have noticed I am less bitter and twisted than when I was drinking (even when I wasn't actually indulging).
Yes, I was hurt she wouldn't tell me on my birthday, alone, the sex of the baby, but that was it, just hurt. I had built myself up that she would, that'll teach me LOL. But I appreciated why she hadn't at the reveal because it was a lovely occasion everyone in both families finding out together.
I didn't even have any evil jealous thoughts when my SILs mother (yes, she was squealy) produced bags of baby boy clothes. She's much better off than I am (as in millionaire league well off) and had bought bags full of boy and girl clothes! They also brought an enormous "welcome baby" hamper full of champagne and caviar, expensive cheeses and such like.
I could just about afford the fare down there again, twice in one week lol
I genuinely enjoyed cooing over the tiny outfits with her and my daughter
Then my daughter sneaked me upstairs away from everyone and showed me all the cute baby outfits she had been buying first
It's also a relief to know my daughter hasn't changed, because the gift she told me the she was most delighted with, and burst into tears when she saw was a baby cardigan my mother had knitted. My mother used to knit all the time, beautiful intricate stuff. She has arthritis now and hasn't knit for years. But she battled through the pain to make this cardigan. My daughter burst into tears when my mother gave it to her, I was touched seeing the two of them in tears having a "moment"
Maybe the poison is leaving my system lol. One of the major reasons I hated myself drinking was because of the vile poisonous emotions it generated in me.