I was engaged to an alcoholic who did follow through with the suicidal talk. Believe, me there is nothing anyone can do to stop someone if that person is determined to go. When I was in that situation, I believed myself to be so powerful and influential with my enormous love and caring, but in retrospect I can see how very powerless I was. I learned the very hard way that everyone is in charge of their own life. People who seem the biggest messes are the best teachers of this truth. I learned that I cannot and need not control anyone else's life. I learned that it is true that if you try to carry an alcoholic, he will die in your arms.
Most of all, I started to learn that emotional independence is healthy and that desperately not wanting give up on someone is toxic for all concerned. I started to learn this very important difference.