View Single Post
Old 04-18-2021, 11:41 AM
  # 18 (permalink)  
dandylion
Community Greeter
 
dandylion's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 16,246
Rainheart.......one thing that you may not have considered.....that he may not even remember much. if any, of what happened the night before---depending on how much he drank the night beofore.
That is known as blackout periods. I think that we sober ones forget about that. We remember every single thing that happened and are still smarting and stewing abouot it, but, the drinking alcoholi has their own built-in anesthesia/amnesia.
It sounds to me like you are trying to detach as a method of reducing your own anxiety and buy you some emotional space from his actions. Yes, that is one of the useful tools in the tool box for your own recovery....and, it DOES buy you some time and space so that you can better gather your strength and think. However, it is just one tool of many that you will need.
Just like a hammer is a valuable tool. but one cannot build a whole house with just a hammer.

do you have any other overwhelming concerns, like financial survival concerns, fear of being alone, fear of what others will think, fear of the image of personal failure, fear of being "blamed" by him., etc.....?
dandylion is offline