I used to supervise a woman who lied a lot. It took me a long time to just. stop. asking. her things - because she'd lie, and I'd be furious all over again.
My husband was an alcoholic, who died about 11 years ago. Even though he drank, I still loved him. I didn't love *living with him* but I was afraid of the financial situation if I left. I once complained on this forum that he never even tried to stop drinking, and someone replied, "He couldn't." Which at some point in his life, was probably true. At some point it isn't a choice any more. It's a compulsion, one that can't be controlled.