Hey Alleyce, I’m back as promised. Have you yet made a Big Plan? The reason I’m asking is not to pressure you but to emphasize the importance of making a real Big Plan. It is the key to fully recognizing the AV. Without a Big Plan, one is vulnerable to the clever machinations of the Beast. I have myself as an example.
When I first decided to do AVRT, I read a few threads and got the gist of the technique and mouthed the words “I’ll never drink again” (note the missing part) and went on using AVRT. It worked great for a while. Until one day coming home from a concert, I got that overwhelming feeling that I was gonna drink...it was already decided in my mind (they call this vertigo in the book). I bought a half-pint and six pack and got drunk. Damn, was I depressed. I soon realized ((by reading that 6-part thread) that I was doing AVRT half-assed, and I needed to make a REAL Big Plan. So I bought the book and read it, also read all of that 6-part thread and made my Big Plan.
I have been over 3.5 years happily alcohol-free. And let me tell you that the AV activity is practically nonexistent. In fact sometimes I purposefully play with my beast by drawing out the AV just to slap it down. This is technique called “shifting” and it’s a useful technique in strengthening your recognition muscles.
Well, I can tell that I’m rambling, so I’ll leave it there. I’m sure more AVRT people will show up soon. The problem is that most of us get sober and move on with our lives, so there aren’t a lot of us that stay around after we get what we need. In fact I didn’t join the site until after 2 years. I got what I needed by reading the book & the 6-part thread. I joined SR so to pay it forward, as a witness to how great this works. My only regret is not doing it sooner.
Keep reading & posting. We are here for you.