Really feel like a drink
Day 58 and I really feel like getting completely p!$$ed. I won’t, I won’t even entertain the idea of it, but it is how I feel. The reason is a lot of memory lane stuff happening and when I think of the past or certain memories come up, the feeling I get (sad? Nostalgic? Melancholy? None of these are perfect descriptors but you get the picture). I’m just feeling so sad yesterday and today. I know this feeling will pass, it always does, but going through it is it’s own unique brand of torture.
Sorry to bother you with this nonsense. I just know from the past if I didn’t tell anyone how I was feeling, eventually it would lead me back to drinking, and I am NOT going there again.