Originally Posted by
thomas11 
I'll address yourself and Dee in this response. I am getting close to being at a fork in the road. One direction is death, the other is prosperity. I'm scratching my chin wondering which one is for me.
Dee, I dont use this site and its members for entertainment, C'mon Dee I've been around here for awhile. You guys are not simply "my fans" and I get a rise out of being stupid. That kind of makes me mad actually. I thought I might get more credit than that, but I guess not.
I can see that. I think though, that the real choice is a little more mundane - death vs normalcy. That's the part that's not actually that attractive, isn't it? Normalcy, humdrum more of the same. It's such a grey landscape full of nothing that I could not bear the thought of it anymore. So I drank. And damned if it didn't greyer still.
But there's another option, Jeff. There's dealing with the stuff that is boiling in that pot of yours under the surface all of the time. That's the key, and I promise you it can be done. Swear on my mother's grave (full disclosure - she's not in there yet), pinkie promise and I'm not making it up.
But here's the thing - you do have to be sober to get there.
I know you're not just having a bit of fun here (though you are certainly well aware that you're being pretty abrasive). There's a whole lot of pain in your angriness. You don't deserve that - no one does.
At the risk of being obnoxious, when do you reckon you'll stop drinking?
Now would be good.
O