Thank you so much all.
We have had quite a few chats over the past few days. He admitted that since we had kids and I started to reduce drinking/partying he started to feel differently towards me. I was not his partner in crime anymore and he found that hard. He resented that he would come home from the pub or a work lunch or a day at work and I would ask for help with the kids straight away (!!) as I had been with them on my own all day! He said on the occasions he stayed at the pub that it was an obvious choice as coming home to a tired wife and 3 kids was not a "fun" option. He is saying all these things and I am listening but I am just in total disbelief that his priorities are this messed up? He also admitted that he does value people on their ability to drink alot/party. He actually said that out loud?
I am just so flabbergasted by all of it and wonder where my judgement switch was when I said yes to marrying him. But I can't think like that now, this is my reality and this is how it played out and now I just need to move forward with peace in my heart.
You have all honesty got me through this last week. I have received so much comfort and reassurance from these messages.