Forget the idea of drinking. The initial point for me was that if you are actually healed from paws...then to me that would mean returning to the physical, mental and psychological state you were at before drinking - that would surely constitute being healed. If for example someone was a heavy drinker for three years, gave up cold turkey, went through horrible paws, abstained for ten years, then started drinking within the guidelines and found themselves back in PAWS....then how could one have been healed? Now this is where it gets extremely complicated for me - when I started drinking I had a lot of anxiety already, I would get stage fright and palpitations already, I was nervous and fearful already, I was a worrier and all those things already. My relationship with drinking helped to combat all of those things until life through serious curve balls at me and went from drinking too much to abusing alcohol without totally realizing it. At 11 months in still anxious and shaky...and still feel like I'm not breathing properly at times...I'm of course wondering whether i will even realize when I have gone through PAWS and am just back to the normal pre-drinking condition. Because then may be I would have to take something to combat the anxiety, and as I really do not want to introduce anything foreign to my body that you have to withdraw from like ad's, like alcohol, like valium ect...which are all just poisons..I would be struggling for solutions. Anyway on a brighter note let's hope the next year is better than this one!!!