Originally Posted by
Flowing 
I had nearly a month and I relapsed tonight.
I don't want to play the victim. I simply decided I could not deal with the emotions that I was experiencing. I was completely overwhelmed and I was not strong enough.
I have drunk a half bottle of scotch and completely ruined nearly a month of sobriety.
I'm not sure if I want to continue this fruitless pursuit of sobriety or just accept the fact that I'm always going to be broken in some way or another and stop fighting for perfection.
No matter what you do now, you’ll be faced with this choice again. So let’s say you just accept that you’ll always be a drunk. Go for it. The only thing that will happen is that you’ll do a bunch more suffering and return again to a point where you tell yourself that drinking doesn’t work and something has to change. So decide now or kick the can down the road, up to you. But drinking as a solution will inevitably abandon you, and the longer you cling to it, the more damage will be done.