Hi,
We're all encouraged to be supportive of each other in these forums. I'm blunt. Just --- take what I'm about to write for what it's worth. Based off what I read, you're WAY overthinking this.
Don't drink alcohol. That's it. Utilize your self-control. You have loads of it just waiting for you to do something with it.
That's all you have to remember to get and stay sober. Don't drink.