Originally Posted by elizabeth1979
I have a little problem with the theory of blaming the disease and absolving the alcoholic of responsibility.
I dont hate the person, I hate the choices, selfishness, and lack of responsibility.
I feel that if the alcoholic took as much time to face their responsibilties as they took to hide from them, the cycle would be easier to break.
I agree. I think the alcoholic jumps on the "it wasn't me it was the addiction or the alcohol" band wagon much to easily. It lets THEM off the hook and allows them to blame and we all know how well they can blame. It lets them shun being responsible for their actions while active. NOW, if they are truely working a good program this won't happen, but that my friend takes time, years even.
Even drunk they have a brain and are able to make choices. I agree the disease make them drink, but the lies, cheating and manipulation are choices they consciously make in order to keep drinking. Just my opinion.
I hate the disease, I hate the choices my husband made while drinking, BUT I love the person. I have to break it down to make it work for me.