Originally Posted by
hummingbird358 
Says he has extreme resentment towards us and won't stay here because he wants to get on with his life and find someone else
hi hummingbird, I think the above is perhaps the most important part of the story here?
He is an addict, yes, but he is also a grown man. How would you have felt if your parents had tried to run your life at his age? I don't know your history, maybe they did? Unless he has a very, very passive personality, your approach to this is guaranteed to cause resentment on his part and a big rift in your relationship.
He has stated how he feels and it's perhaps time to really take that to heart. If not, at some point, he probably will stop contacting you altogether.