batchel------I am glad to hear that you are interested in learning more. Not only for you, but the fact that you have young children---and, the more you know, the better prepared you will be to protect them from the "family disease" of alcoholism. As you probably already know---alcoholism and the destructive effects are passed down through generations. This ia a golden opportunity to stop the cycle with your own children.
My first suggestions are for Your own recovery and development---
I went back and scanned your previous threads, and I noted that your father was an alcoholic. Even though your mother divorced him---it has many effects on the children. I highly suggest that you get and read the materials of the group---"Adult Children of Alcoholics/dysfunctional families". I think it will resonate with you very much. You can get their "big book" and other related books on amazon.com.
simply go to the book section of amazon and type in "Adult Children of Alcoholics" I sincerely think that you owe this much to yourself.
the other thing that I would like to say to you is this-------
Whenever I hear about an alcoholic that has tried to quit many times, but has relapsed many times, like your husband has----the question of Dual Diagnosis comes to my mind----at least, as a red flag that deserves consideration. It is often said that about one fourth to one third of alcoholics have another--or, more mental or psychological condition----in Addition to the alcoholsim. In fact, many times the alcoholic may be medicating an undiagnosed or treated mental health condition. This is important, becaise, if ALL of the conditions are not recognized and treated---it is unlikely that long term sobriety will be achieved.
I suggest that you google "Dual Diagnosis in alcoholism" and/or "Co-occuring diagnoses with alcoholism". You will find many articles on the internet. You can find many videos on You Tube on the same subject. If your ex should relapse again and go to another rehab---I suggest that a rehab that specializes in dual-diagnosis ONLY, would be the best choice.
Now---understand that I am not suggesting that you be in charge of his treatment. You can't be. However, if you are ever asked---you will be knowledgeable. Also, this knowledge can be liberating to you, by helping you cut through your (understandable) resentment. In addition, anything that benefits him will benefit your children, in the long run.
You asked about books to read-----If you haveb't already read "Co-dependent No More", I think you would benefit from it. It is the most recommended book on this forum/
If you are interested in how the alcoholic mind works-----I suggest that you consider "The Addicted Brain" by Michael Kuhar. You can get it on amazon.com.
Seren gave you a link to our stickies section---above the regular threads. The section that I think you will benefit greatly from is the "Classic Reading" section. There are more than l00 articles!!
Enough for you to read one every single day. Written by people who have walked in your same shoes. ***I notice that Classic Reading section has been recommended to you in a previous thread. It is a great daily reading resource.
batchel----you have been given a lot of learning material---LOL. That is o.k. Knowledge is power.