Hi Miss P Yes, if I knew in the past what I know now, I could have saved myself a lot of trouble.
I think my father had NPD, I used to think it was the drink that made him act like he did. But then as I got older he had some pretty long stints off it, due to his health. His behaviour was the same basically. He saw us all as HIS possessions, wanted to control everything about us, even our thoughts. Which ended in me being very rebellious, leaving home young and having problems with any "authority" figures.
And yet? I ended up with most controlling men possible. Being brought up by someone with NPD I think disables your psychic alarm system. You don't realise they are acting abnormally, you believe what they say about you, that you have all of this grief brought down upon your head because of the way YOU act. When with hindsight, you are just trying to set up healthy normal boundaries. They don't like this. You have no boundaries in their mind, you are just an extension of them, you only exist to serve their need for narcissistic supply, positive or negative, doesn't matter.
I have a narcissistic playlist in my head now, bit late!
I think everyone has some narcissistic traits, personality disorders are just normal human personality traits and emotions taken to the extreme, to the exclusion of other normal personality traits and emotions.
Yes, love doesn't exist for a these people, only supply. Faking love is just a way to get the fish on the line.
And never never admit to any of your faults to one haha. They suck information from you about yourself in the guise of getting to know each other and turn it into bullets to use against you at a later date. As in, they do something mean and cruel, you protest and to minimize their action and make you feel you are over blowing things they will say stuff like "you said yourself you are sometimes over sensitive about ......"
Yes that money is earmarked, not that that ever stopped me in the past. I have to watch today, in the past I have gone through a none drinking pay day struggling not to drink, then drank the next day.
Today though am going to be busy. Have my oldest grandchild to babysit (his school hasn't reopened) and my littler one to pick up from school.
Also, my landlady is coming tomorrow, so have to scrub this house to within an inch of it's life and clear some bush cuttings out of the garden that I was too tired (lazy) to bag up yesterday. And it has been pouring with rain all night, so that will be a joy
I went to bed early last night, but went to sleep late and up at 5 so a bit tired.
Yes, David Icke has been censored all over the internet now. I buy his books though, so enjoy rereading those as they are a lot to take in first read.
Enjoy your day Miss P
