Kitty, not drinking is great news, well done!
I too felt depressed last year and had suicidal ideation, after tumultuous events in my life. Sadly, I didn't reach out and seek help, instead I drank. I threw away two and a half years of sobriety, by listening to the AV that alleged I could 'switch off my thoughts and relax with a few drinks, for a few nights, help me to sleep etc." or words to that effect. I caved in and fell back into drinking excessively, making all of my problems seem worse, and my mental and physical health plummeted. Plus I was rendered incapable of dealing with my life. It took me many months to climb back out of the addiction pit, and on reflection, I very nearly didn't.
I realise none of us learn from other people's mistakes, but just thought I'd recount mine, to you. Please stay strong, Kitty, and maybe talk to someone, I found it really helped.