Originally Posted by
Freedom1990 
When I got sober, considering the things I did to the people who loved me, "I'm sorry" just didn't cut it. I had to demonstrate in my daily life that I was embracing recovery, and changing my life around.
I had a boyfriend when I was a very young woman, who treated me rather poorly. 20/20 hindsight, he was probably an alcoholic. We eventually went our separate ways, and not amicably.
Fast forward to this year, and I reconnected via Fakebook to one of "Ralph's" buddies from back then. Buddy didn't go into details, but gave the impression that Ralph didn't just treat me badly, but made a mess of his other relationships as well. Then Buddy speculated, rather than try to sort things out, Ralph moved across the country to 'leave his past behind.'
I don't think much about the shame aspect. My husband never, ever, expressed any. Doesn't mean it didn't exist. Thanks for a view from the other side.