It seems like a lot of alcoholics have a tremendous amount of shame and self-loathing. I wonder if this makes it difficult to say I'm sorry. If they did that they would need to really own their destructive behavior. I'm not sure if that is the case but makes sense to me. My AH would apologize early on for his binge nights but won't any more, for him I truly believe it's shame. He will tell me though that his drinking really doesn't effect me, just the typical night time drinking himself to sleep kind of thing.