"Most of us were unwilling to admit we were real alcoholics". This is the first sentence in the chapter about alcoholism in the AA book.
But it seems to be necessary to admit exactly what the problem is in order to find an appropriate fix.
I did not want to admit my alcoholism. When in the hospital I found a much more attractive problem that I would prefer to admit to. A temporal lobe condition sounded good to me. That explained everything, and it all started with a bang on the head when I was 16.
Of course the treatment for this condition would be completely different to an effective treatment for alcoholism. For one thing, as far as I knew, it would not involve stopping drinking. Strange how I would rather be a certified lunatic than an alcoholic.
I was unable to persuade the doctors of my diagnosis. They had too much information on me.
But here is the question: Do you think my deluded misdiagnosis, my admission of a temporal lobe condition would have solved the real problem?
In the end I had to admit to the real problem and accept a treatment specifically for that condition.