Sva, I'm so sorry that you are going through this distressing situation. Good for you for determining not to drink. I think you will be far more able to deal with things and with your emotions as you remain sober.
It sounds like this is time for a heart-to-heart talk with your wife where you decide what you both want to do. Maybe couples counselling is an option you could look into?
I wish you peace, Sva.