Welcome Anotherchance30,
Welcome! Guilt is a horrible weapon this disease uses to keep you in it's grips. It will take a while to get a grip on in a see it for what it is, negativity trying to keep you drinking. At some point, there will be things you need to deal with, but right now, not drinking is most important. When you feel guilty, remember that you have a disease and try to forgive yourself for being sick. Remember, that as long as you are working on your recovery, you are no longer that person that you are when you drink. It will get easier, I promise. Just don't give into the guilt, it literally kills.
It is always a good idea for a check up at your Doctor, and if you are really ready to quit, you won't mind telling them that you have a problem, once you say it out loud, it will be a huge burden lifted off your shoulders. It is scary to admit it, but admitting we have a problem is step one for a reason, once you put it put there, there is no taking it back.
Hugs, Cathy