CRRHCC

My bottom was when I learned to listen to my thinking brain instead of my emotional brain. When I thought about my behavior for 4 decades on autopilot I realized that I believed that life, "should," be fair, easy and painless and I should always get what I want. That might sound ridiculous, but the fact is that emotionally I did believe this. Naturally when you think like this, anything that goes wrong is going to make you, "rage," and fix your emotions with a quick fix or mood changer of substances. That's what addiction is. A behavior used to reverse feelings of helplessness, feeling trapped, powerless and out of control. The antidote is to regain control, empower myself with direct healthy behaviors that are of high value to me. If that sounds too simple, it's because it is! It's a matter of seeing the forest through the trees of life.

Now I view the inevitable adversity of life from a different perspective. I view it as the price of admission to a meaningful life.
I get a high off having values and purpose that don't include a massive hang over and regretful behavior. I simply find more happiness in being sober than intoxicated! I learn to reverse feelings of helplessness with more healthy direct behaviors. When I use to get drunk, I thought that brought me more happiness. Perhaps it did at the time but it does not any longer. I've learned not to get my values from my feelings but instead from what I think is important in life. There is no magic here, just taking time to think and grow up. Realizing that a child expects life to meet its demands but an adult meets the demands of life!

When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up, I put away childish things. - 1 Corinthians 13:11