I know I just said liver disease or cancer because I really do feel that bad. Today I peed a lot and I think it's because of diabetes. Since 9:00 I've been to the bathroom 5 times. And I was reading online about being anemic and a good test they say is to look at your lower inner eyelid and if they're a vibrant red you most likely are not anemic. My lower eyelids are light pink in color almost white so that pretty much clinches that I have anemia.
My mother died of cancer at 61, and when she did get to the doctor because she was afraid to go he told her she was anemic. After finding out she was anemic she only lasted a couple months. I've always thought that I was going to end up the same way and there's a good possibility that is what's happening. She was always afraid to go to the doctor too.
Believe it or not I actually have feelings that I want to go to a doctor. But I also have a lot of thoughts about how crazy they will think I am, because what kind of person would be so afraid to go to a doctor that they would let their health fail so bad? And my teeth are bad and they do not look good at all that will be a sure sign of craziness. And I don't want to be judged for things that I had lost all control over and lost my mind over. But I do cling to some hope that what I have is anemia and diabetes some less severe illnesses I suppose.