The whole thanksgiving thing is just - drama.
There are a lot of things wrong in this whole picture, but you already know that.
Truthfully, this part:
Keep in mind, this is a funny, beautiful, and amazing person in so many ways.
She is not two people. She is one person. All those nice things you posted AND an addict.
The question is, are you prepared to marry an addict? I mean REALLY prepared. Are you prepared for the self-centered,
alcohol above all and everything, partner?
If you are not going to marry her, in all fairness, you need to tell her that. Anything less is leading her on and is hurtful.
She wants you to accept her and her addiction, you want her to be sober.
Neither of you are willing to negotiate either of these things, correct?