Originally Posted by
woodlandlost 
Thanks. I know I am reacting out of fear. I am keeping it contained inside of me and in no way am hindering her ability to attend in-patient services. For sure my fear and sadness come out. And yes, I understand that is not helpful either. I do appreciate the reminder.
If you mean you show that to her, then yes, that's not helpful and it is a hindrance to her and to you actually.
When you show that to her, when she is so vulnerable, you are requesting that she respond really, to make you feel better. Much better to not expect anything from her right now.
For you, being fearful, holding that in, it also stops you from moving forward and to some degree acknowledging what you need to do and from hearing others.
I'll give you an example, in a nutshell. I know someone who got divorced, we will call her A. B did not want the divorce but went along with it all kind of. There was a child involved. B decided it was a good idea to discuss all of their feelings about the divorce and relationship with the teenager. He could not stop himself, despite being asked by A, repeatedly. She could see the damage it was doing (and it did and remains to this day).
So you see, it is incredibly important that you don't dump your feelings on her right now, it's not fair to her. While it may seem like you can't help it, you can, but you are going to need help. Post here, get a therapist, join a divorce support group, go to Al-Anon. Those are all safe places to vent and discuss your feelings. She is in no shape to be there for you or to support you and you can't expect it.
I'm sorry if that sounds harsh, I don't mean it to be but I also know your intent is to not do damage.