I have very vivid dreams about XAH, sometimes in the dream we are still together and happy, sometimes it's scary and sad. In real life, he's a very sad person whose life has been inarguably altered by addiction to the point of homelessness and extreme physical and emotional dysfunction. Sometimes these dreams really disturb me, make me upset, make me sad and wistful for the good times. I loved him so much, was so attracted to him in the early days, and frequently my brain pulls those memories for a revisit. It's outrageous how vivid those feelings can still be, and my visceral reaction to him.
A therapist put some of those dream-related feelings into perspective for me by pointing out that a dream is inherently 100% you - your feelings, your thoughts, your memories, your anxieties - because it happens completely inside your own head. An interesting lens to view it through. But also, your brain, as part of the work of healing, is also working itself over while you sleep and pulls "old files" to make narrative sense of the work it's doing while you sleep, hence these old memory dreams. So while I keep having these dreams, and sometimes I'm bugged by them, this perspective is helpful to put it into context. My brain is working over other unrelated, daily anxieties - did I answer that email, am I a good mother, what is the meaning of life - by "explaining" them with memories known to be anxious for me, my ex. That's all.