I am working on detaching by not offering help right now. My Ax2B moved out a couple of months ago. Within 2 weeks he walked off a 12-foot-retaining wall while he was drunk and has been unable to work since and is unsure when he will be released to work again (cracked vertebrae, broken ribs). He's getting some money but not a lot and it barely covers rent from what I understand. He's seeing our son on weekends and I know DS eats when he's there but I also know that his resources are very stretched. I am having strong urges to offer him food to take home when he picks DS up for visits. My resources are somewhat stretched since he left but more like I have to plan what I do and can't impulsively go to restaurants. Our basics are well covered. I feel sad for not offering him meals or groceries but I also know that he did this to himself and it's not my job to pick up after him any more. I also am relatively positive that his drinking and pot smoking is still well-protected from his poor financial situation.