when you say you tried to "drink like a normal person" (who are these normal people and what do they drink like!!!!! FS!!!!) what did you try to do differently?
Did you use any HARM REDUCTION techniques or did you just jump back into the rough waters believing you could now swim despite no swimming lessons?
Did you use any apps and become very mindful of your blood alcohol level at all times?
Personally I probably wouldn't be sailing through sober October if it weren't for the HARM REDUCTION techniques which broke the cycle of binges.
I feel a similar way as you with regard to social life / relationships and alcohol and would say that I broke several fairly long spells of alcohol free time because of that reason. If somebody had of suggested HARM REDUCTION techniques to me it would have ended binges and reduced their impact sooner.
My plan going forward with regards to the social aspect? Create a fun and interesting social life without alcohol NOW and then we will see later if I wish to abstain or not. Friday night I went to the local theatre (comedy) and last night to a concert. No alcohol although it did cross my mind, but i am locked into a commitment of HARD RESTART with myself in order to TRANSCEND my own circumstances.
With regard to dating etc my frame of mind is ; build a happy single life first up to the point where I have to ask myself..."damn, where would i honestly fit someone into my life??" The contrast between that energy and the energy of "needing" someone is a world apart (and it comes across in the sub communications)