In.
I spent a couple of years beating myself up almost daily. At the very beginning of sobriety it was all day every day. I think maybe I needed to do that for a while, so it would sink in fully that I had behaved very badly at times and that I really really didn't want to do that anymore.
As time went on and I made amends and people started to move beyond the tings I had done and the things I had said while in my active alcoholism, I knew I needed to turn my efforts to forgiving myself. I'm still working on that. There are a few things I will never forgive myself fully for, and I think that's OK. I can live with some well-deserved guilt and remorse for a couple of things, like driving drunk and hurting my Man Friend in ways that are inexcusable in my book. Those things are not forgivable, but I don't beat myself up all the time any more about them. They happened. I take full responsibility. I will not do those things again. But I will not forget - and probably won't forgive myself.