Originally Posted by
woodlandlost 
feeling bad tonight. Ex had been on a good run after detox. Started seeing DD, we were all together...i struggled being around her tho. Lots of upset for me still. She was waiting on an inpatient bed but has started drinking again...
I feel awful...like am i doing the right thing, just freaking sad tonight.
So nothing has changed.
Playing happy families right now is maybe really bad for you? I know you want to be with her, I totally get it.
Is she still seeing the other guy?
I'm not saying you are wrong, I just see you getting hurt over and over. No wonder you are in despair, this situation is pretty intolerable.
Perhaps the best way forward is making some changes for yourself. Glad to hear you are getting out. Now, you may not feel the best when out and kind of have to act happy when that is far from how you are feeling but doing things like meeting friends - well think of it as small steps to healing and moving forward.