Peo…..I got to thinking about your situation.....and, you are pretty sure that your boyfriend is not coming back.....
Did you know that there are now, books written for mothers raising boys? You can find them by going to amazon.com and typing in "mothers raising boys", in the book section. You can read the reviews on each book, to pick the one(s) that you like the most.....
even if he does come back...with an alcoholic....you will still, probably still end up doing most of the parenting....
for sure, it takes strong mothers to raise strong boys......