Peo…..building on what trailmix said.....many alanon meetings have childcare....
google the meetings...and, you can give a call and ask, ahead of time.....
I have a couple of suggestions for you....
Get and read "Co-dependent No More"....it is the most recommended book on this forum. It is an easy read and I think a lot of it will resonate with you!
There is sooo much for you to learn....
Knowledge is Power