Every time I've ever dealt with anyone in the medical field they really did not have any clue at all about anxiety. I really don't understand that. If I go to the appointment I will stick it out but I still don't know for sure if I will go. I know I've said it before I just need someone to talk to.
My mind has always worked overtime it just never stops thinking. And then I have the OCD anxiety thoughts which just won't leave my head sometimes. I'm driving now so I'll just drive myself there unless I possibly go with my son but I doubt that very much.
Living living like this is truly unbearable. And also just the thoughts of going to the doctor are unbearable. I do sometimes actually visualize the whole process. I really know I do have to do this I mean it is a very difficult thing for me to do.
I think about this and this is all about an extreme fear ofsomething that I've never been able to conquer. I'm not afraid of heights for example, so if somebody that was terrified of heights had to walk across a 6 inch wide board for say a hundred feet to get to the doctor he wouldn't be able to do it. But I could probably one across the border if I could still run.