So, I set my boundaries that illegal drugs in the house is not acceptable. That not being transparent is not acceptable. And abuse of drugs is not acceptable. Honestly, I don't see him admitting to any of this or taking responsibility, so I am trying to make a list of what will happen next. Because if he cannot meet these boundaries, then he will need to find another place to live.
The thing is, what you have set down are rules for him to follow...not boundaries. Boundaries are like rules for
you. A boundary would be something like
I will not live with someone who lies to me. or
I will not allow illegal drugs in my home. Then, you decide what
you will do if these boundaries are crossed.
You can tell him to leave, but what if he refuses? It is his home, too, so what happens then? Are you prepared to leave? Are you prepared to file for divorce? These are questions you must ask yourself.