Today's minor update:
After ex died, I let people know that I would be compiling a book of memories or reminiscences about ex to give to Kid so she has some positive stories about her father - so please send me any happy or funny memories you have of ex from high school/university/work/wherever. Lots of people said "oh, what a great idea! I'll definitely jot down a few thoughts! Love that you're doing this for Kid!". I asked people to send them to me by today, so I can get this memory book printed and done with before school starts.
You guessed it - almost no one has followed through. A few people sent in stories, all from at least 15 years ago, and most of them from people who were primarily my friends. Nothing from his most recent ex-wife or her daughter (with whom I'm on good terms), nothing from the girlfriend he had when he died, nothing from what remains of his family of origin, nothing from his erstwhile best friend.
It's another dimension of "addiction is sad". If you're an alcoholic long enough, you will betray, shock or isolate yourself from everyone to the extent that they don't want anything to do with you even after you're dead. In this case the person left picking up the pieces is the only person who couldn't get away from the alcoholic (me) because I had a child with him.