Thanks so much for all of the advice. It has helped me to realize that I should coup with my feelings first and ask myself how do I really feel about all of this. I don't deserve this type of life. I work hard to provide for my family, maybe I'm just a nice guy that is on the path of finishing last. I will look for some support groups and couseling in my area. I feel that I could benefit from the sessions because even if I go through with the divorce I am unsure if I will ever trust again because the pain and mistrust I feel is so great. I am also afraid of exploding inside and making things worse. Just the fact that I am writing about all of this goes against my character but it has helped me think about how I feel. I am hoping that is the first step.
Sincerely,