Originally Posted by
ZeroNowhere570 
Right back to where I was. Even more depressed. Even more angry, arrogant and disrespectful to those that love me. I wish God would just take my life already so I can end this cycle.
Shame is a vicious cycle. Shame=Pain=Drink=Shame.
None of us are perfect. Forgive yourself. Pick yourself up and start anew. Find something that you value in life and make it a purpose. Maybe go so far as to ask God for help.
2 Corinthians 12:9 "MY GRACE IS SUFFICIENT FOR YOU, FOR MY POWER IS MADE PERFECT IN WEAKNESS."
God’s grace is power enough because when we swallow our pride, accept our imperfection and give God control, we are empowered with new strength. Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth. Mathew 5:5 That’s the paradox of depending on God: The more you’re weak, the more you depend on him. And the more you depend on God, the stronger you get.